Ib & Ob: IOP Paradox Part 7

Human Interlude #3

J: Mr President we think the incident in Turkey involved a NTI.

Mr President: What is that some form of trading instrument I have never heard of before or perhaps a currency from one of those really small countries like England.

J: Mr President please do not talk like that the walls have ears.

Mr President: I do not see any ears looks flat to me.

J: Well technically the walls in here are curved which is why everything is bent to hell.

Mr President: Language!

J: What hell?

Mr President: No 'bent' we do not want people knowing what I really...

J: But they already..err..Yes Mr President.  Mr Berg your science adviser can best explain it.

Mr Berg: NTI Mr President stands for Non-Terrestrial Intelligence.

Mr President's hair: is there any other kind. 

Mr Berg: What did you say I couldn't hear what you said. Mr President have you been putting that oil I gave you on your hair?

Mr President: I did not say anything. Lets nuke them get rid of two stones with one errr.

Mr Berg: Mr President I think nuking a member of NATO would be a bad idea.

Mr President: How about a tweet, it is amazing how much money you can make with a single tweet.

J: Mr President I think a tweet might be worse than nuking them, remember Bob sir.

Mr President: Bob that bobs around, that's pretty funny.

J: Yes Mr President very droll your wit astounds me at times. Can we get back to the matter at hand Mr President what do you want to do in Turkey.

Mr President: Let them handle it, I'm the President of the United...

J: States sir.

Mr President: Yes I know, have they delivered my new quilt yet with the stars on the inside?

Mr Berg: But Mr President I think we should address the problem in Turkey, this could be a prelude to war by the NTIs.

Mr President's  hair: Only if they are stupid. 

Mr President: I think we should play golf this afternoon if I'm not allowed to blow stuff up or send a tweet it has to be golf.

Mr Berg & J: Yes Mr President.

Ib & Ob: IOP Paradox Part 6

some time ago...

WARNING! WARNING! Anomaly detected!

Initiate Hibernation De-sequence

Signal Located

Initiate Communications

some time now...

Ib: one down two to go.

T1: What did you say?

Ib: I was wondering about the history of the statue you are searching for?

T1: I don't care about history, its a paying job.

Ib: Your just a mercenary then?

T1: Not just a I am The Mercenary!

Ib: I do know a little bit about art myself and that statue looks like it was made by young humans.

T1: I thought you said you hadn't see it.

Ib: I have seen it in images that is why I am here to see it physically.

T1: Really, you came to see something that you say was made by kids. Where exactly are you from?

Ib: Lots of different places.

T1: Really! I think you have more a hands behind your back than you are saying.  I think we need to shake you up.

Ib: Wait! Do not something you may...

T1: Too late.

Ib: OB!!! Why exactly is my face squashed against the ceiling? I can barely move!

Ob: They must be using s-waves to create negative mass. Try resetting the suit it should cancel the waves out.

T1: Who are speaking to?  Who are you?

Ib: Turn both our signals down I cannot reach control.

Ob: One interval.

Ib: One of my other selves just found the RSK, locator is attached.

Ob: Received, well that is an ugly looking thing.

Ib: I can reset the suit now, errr Ob can you do it remotely.

Ob: One interval.

Human Interlude #2

J: Mr President there has been an incident in Turkey. 

Mr President: Agent J are they complaining about the tariffs already. 

J: Mr President my name is not Agent J that was just some film you watched please try to remember that. The incident incurred in the national museum involving a giant tentacled creature. 

Mr President: Perhaps one of the ex-CIA directors knows something? 

J: Mr President you have revoked all their clearances they can't help you. 

Mr President: Maybe Mr Fox on the box knows? 

J: Mr President that box doesn't know everything and it only tells you stuff you want to hear.

Ib & Ob: IOP Paradox Part 5

Ob (over the TCL): Have you still got the artifact?

Ib: Of course, one of my other selves has it. I sent myself to back of the crowd whilst they search for the RSK. Can you please turn down the telepathic communications link, someone is bound to pick it up.

Six vibrations follow another six vibrations then another...

Ob: Remember do not attract attention to yourself.

Ib: I will not have too if you do not turn the link knob into the middle. Besides I think there is something odd about the three driving the mob.

Ob: What do you mean?

Ib: Just set the link to receive only and I will tweak the signal at this end.

T1: Who are you talking to?

Ib: No one.  Perhaps can I ask why are you here?

T1: I'm here to point this gun at you, now shut up.

Ib: I think you misunderstood, I meant why here?

T1: Well if you must know we are looking for a stone statue.

Ib: In a room full of stone carvings.

T1: I saw you as soon as we came in, you were here already, have you got the statue?

Ib: Err what does the statue look like?

T1: It is a stone carving of the three aliens.

Ib: Which sector?

T1: What did you say?

Ib: Well everyone knows you get different aliens from different parts of the galaxy. So I hear on the conspiracy theory...

T1: For a moment there I thought perhaps that you knew more than you are letting on.

Ib: Basically you here to steal from the Muse of Urns?

T1: What did you call this place, its a museum.  We are not stealing merely requiring lost property.

Ib: Have you ever wondered what your life is?

T1: What, no! Well okay a little bit yes.  Why am I even talking to you about this.

Lady: Err excuse me my older gentleman friend here wants to go to toilet.

T1: And?

Lady: The toilets are in the foyer.

Ib: Perhaps I can be of help, why do not you ask your friend over their pointing that metal tube I mean gun and take the sub err Lady and her friend back to the foyer.

T1: I suppose so, its weird having a special place for...